Birthday busyness

You wouldn't believe to how much birthday partys I have attent these days. My grandma, my aunt, my brother...all their birthdays are coming up. And with the celebrating comes along a hole variety of temtations. Birthday cake, birthday dinners, sweets, booze.. horrible!
I hope I can make it through this hole birthday insanity.
I'm expected to eat and I don't want to. I feel like people are wanting me to eat that I stay beeing the "fat girl". Sometimes I whish I could escape this hole world of relashionships and family. I could do what I want a be thin, finally.
I have a new passion by the way. I bought a sewing machine and it is fantastic. I can't wait to sew myself a hole lot of stuff. I'm still learning but I love it. Yesterday I sewed a little cell phone purse. I had this cute fabric, white with little red flowers and the purse turned out really good. I'm so excited!
Eatingwise I'm doing okay. I decided to weigh myself only once a week and I'm making friday my weigh-in day. I'm thinking about doing a more strict plan, with a hole weeks intake preplanned. I'll let you know when I have it ready.

sunday morning post

I've been doing good, but still my weight isn't changing which is disappointing. I think I have to change my plan maybe. Yesterday I went for a walk with my friend J who came to visit. We took a long walk, which was nice. The weather was absolutely gorgeous. Later I cooked for him, I made a salat, cooked veggies and some pasta. I think he noticed that I didn't eat much of the pasta, but he didn't say something. Then we went to the movies and watched a funny kids movie, because we were late to the theater and the movie we originally inteded to watch already started. But it was still fun.
My plan for today (after my coffee, which I'm having right now) is to do Yoga and then do some cleaning in my appartment, I have a lot on my to-do-list. I think I'm going to do some bycicling later this day. It's a good workout and I can enjoy the nice weather.
So enjoy the day ladies and stay strong!

stucked on 179

Also today my weight didn't move. Dinner was okay yesterday evening. My mom made wholegrain- vegetable-pancakes and they where lowfat with tzaziki dip. I had half of a pancake and just a little of the dip. During the day I had coffee (44cal), an apple (60cal) and cucumbersoup with shrimps (198cal), for the pancake I'll count 350 calories. This adds up to 652 calories for the day.
I'm really hoping to lose two more pounds until next week. Unfortunately a friend is visiting me on saturday which means I'll have to eat something with him during the day. Maybe I'll cook for him. That's better than going to a restaurant where I can't be sure how much oil and other crap they put into their food.
I'm a little stressed out about college lately. I have a big assignment to do and I haven't started yet. I don't feel confident that I'm gonna do a good job on this and it's driving me nuts! I'll just have to do it I guess. I hate failure and I'm a pefectionist so it is not acceptable for me to not do good.
Well, enough of that.
I whish everybody a successful weekend!
Be strong girls!
<3

1 pound down - 59 to go

I lost one pound when i stepped on the scale this morning. I'm really hoping that I'll lose another one tomorrow since I've done well today. I did some bicycling today and burned about 340 calories. And I ate not much troughout the day and had my main meal in the evening.
This is what I ate:
coffee with a little milk (30cal)
1 apple (60cal)

1 nectarine (51cal)

salmon and steamed veggies (314cal)

low fat milk (110cal)

(total: 565)

Tomorrow I'll have dinner at my parents house which is gonna be a struggle. I think I'm gonna eat nothing until dinner (only liquids) and then eat a little bit, telling my family I ate a lot before I came.

Whish me luck that I'll find the strength to not binge.

thank you my followers for following my blog!

Together we can do it!

Intro

I'm sailing to thinisland..but trust me there is a long way ahead of me.
I'm far from beeing thin at the moment and I hate it. So I sat down today and decided that now is the time and I need to devote everything to my goal. Not that I haven't tried in the past, but I haven't tried enough. This blog is hopefully helping me to remind me of my goals and keeps me staying on track.
A bit about me and my life:
I am 24, I am a student and I live by myself in an appartment, which has its good and bad sides.
I have bulimic episodes since the last 3 years, i've given up the purging (I'm tempted to do it still, but I'm trying not to) but the binges are still happening. I usually try to fast afterwards, but still I hate binging and it's causing me weightgain.
At the time my weight is ridiculously heigh. I weigh 180 lbs, it is simply disgusting. My goal weight is 120 lbs ( I'm a 5'8 by the way).
Most of this weight I gained throughout the last 3 years, before i weighed "healthy" 145 lbs and thanks to my binging and purging i gained 35 pounds.
So that's it for today, i'll write somemore about me in the next post.
Until then, Thinisland here I come!